Benches Clear, Bananas Bash Blowfish in Doubleheader

Written by Biko Skalla:

 

Things got chippy in Lexington County as benches cleared in game 2, frustrations boiling over for the Blowfish as the Nanners swept the doubleheader. And I don’t blame Lexington County for getting nasty, I can’t begin to imagine how bad it feels losing all six games they’ve played against the Bananas. If you took Savannah off their schedule they’d be a terrific 10-5 on the season, and I’m sure they’d be having a lot more fun too. But unfortunately for them you can’t do that. You have to play the Bananas, and that drops them below .500 to 10-11 on the summer. Oof baboof. Anyhow, that’s enough sad Blowfish talk. The Bananas took both games in Lexington County to end the 1st half of the season 19-3, and I’ll tell ya how they did it right about now.

With the doubleheader being the finale of the boys playing 6 games in 4 days, pitching was going to be a premium as Tyler, I can’t do a darn thing about the music, Gillum, and the most eligible bachelor on the coaching staff, Corey Pye, turned to Thomas, I’m a disappointment to my parents for not swimming for Tulane, Vincent, on the mound. Tom was stellar as ever, tossing 3.1 scoreless innings only allowing 3 hits while striking out 4 and lowering his ERA to 1.25 on the summer. Matthew, the most mysterious man in the two-state area, Steidl, came in with a man on and 2 outs in the fourth and gave up an immediate walk (unacceptable, I know, I know). Steidl was easy, breezy, and beautiful after that though, retiring 7 guys in a row to keep the game scoreless going into the 7th (last) inning.

The man singlehandedly keeping The Zoo Health Club in business, Eduardo Malinowski, lead off the top of the 7th with a towering solo home run to right center field, his second of the season, to give the Nanners a 1-0 lead. That was all Grandaddy Steidl would need, as he set down the Blowfish 1-2-3 in the 7th to make it 10 straight bad bears retired, locking up a 1-0 victory for his team and the CPL pitching line of the night for himself.

It turned out Mr. Ivy League had the right mindset for his game winning at-bat because of a chat he had right before it.

“It all started when I was on deck and my boy Ty Jackson came up and gave me a pep talk and slapped my tush,” Eddie said. “I yelled at him because he only got my right cheek, so then he slapped me real hard on my left cheek to to even it out. Then I got in the box, got the pitch I wanted, took advantage of it, and my 8 trips to the Zoo every day finally paid off.”

Truly illuminating stuff, Ed, thank you.

The guys were ready to rumble early in game 2, with Ty, the next time I slap Eddie’s keister I’m getting both those cheeks at once, Jackson, lining a single to right. The Greek God of Getting On-Base, Cole Kitchen, Eduardo, and Nick, I almost had the greatest birthday moment ever yesterday until that ball died on the warning track and then it was actually a terrible birthday memory, Clarno, all got plunked and the Bananas took a 2-0 lead. Bryson, half my hits this summer will be doubles, Bloomer, laced an RBI double to left-center in the 3rd inning to bring home the man I would fight last out of every player in the CPL, Danny Oberst.

Christian, I bopped a guy on the head once in a brawl, Dearman, threw 3 dynamite innings, allowing only 1 run on 4 hits while striking out 5. Davis, I bet I’ll give the best postgame quotes on the team this summer, Hare, was spectacular in his Bananas debut, as the Seminole retired all 9 Blowfish he faced, throwing only 21 pitches in 3 scoreless frames. Davis was as eloquent as advertised when I asked him about his first outing for the Nanners.

“It was fun,” Hare said.

The Bananas offense was ruthless all evening, pushing 3 more runs across as they batted around in the 4th inning, and then piling on 8 runs in the 7th as they sent 12 guys to the dish. Ty, Danny, Bryson, Drew, I would love to play every game in this park, Yniesta, and Bill, honestly 2-4 doesn’t do me justice tonight because I was 5-5 on Q’s, Leroy, all had 2 hits a piece. The professional door shutter, Dylan Cunningham, slammed home the 14-1 victory with a perfect 7th inning on the mound, striking out 1.

Benches and bullpens had cleared in the middle of the 4th inning, as a Lexington County coach and player both had bizarrely strong words for Danny Oberst, who once again as his nickname states, is literally the last person in this league you should be saying anything wild to. There was some fun chatter from both sides, nothing close to fisticuffs ever occurred, and the Bananas let their bats do the talking throughout the rest of the night.

As I said in my intro to this recap, it’s been complete and utter domination by the Bananas this summer against Lexington County and the Blowfish boys are probably just sick of getting bodied each time they face Savannah. Unfortunately for them, the next game the Nanners play will be Tuesday night in Grayson Stadium… against the Blowfish… Oof Baboof.

But until then, lookout for my weekly recap coming out midday Sunday, and I’ll see you Tuesday night for a little 6:30 pregame show!

 

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